Deliberate Parenting

Before I had Owen I always thought parenting would be somewhat easy. I thought I could hug and kiss him a lot to show him how much I cared, read all the Dr. Dobson I could get my hands on, be consistent with discipline and share Jesus with him. I thought we would be going to the Farmers market on the weekends, taking fun mom and son dates and doing lots of adventurous things in the Summer. In my pre parent mind I had no idea how all-encompassing motherhood would be. I had no idea I would have to schedule time to brush my teeth, struggle to still date my husband and that all the things I thought before weren’t going to be enough.
Sometime in the last 6 months I have realized that my parenting needed to change. Though I was disciplining and trying to be consistent, I wasn’t see real change and the change I was seeing was in action and not in heart. I have come to realize that I was just putting out fires and not thinking long-term. With a baby in the house who doesn’t sleep much at night and wants all my attention during the day, I lost sight of needing to make goals for Owen. Goals in the sense of fostering great character in him like service, honor, respect and kindness. I came to realize that I need to be deliberate. To be deliberate means to be studied, intentional, carefully weighing, steadily moving forward. slow in deciding, unhurried. These are the things I need to be doing as a parent because it is the second greatest job I have been given next to being a wife. It is going to take time, tough decisions, a whole lot of patience and discipline on my part to be this kind of parent. The world is already telling him how to treat people, how to think about himself, how to speak to me and it is never going to stop so I can’t take a back seat. I want to ponder the skills that are important for him to have in life and make a deliberate plan to get there.
A lot of this was stirred in my heart through several blogs that I read and I want to share them with you. This first one is my favorite. It has some of the most provoking thoughts on parenting. It is solid, a quick read and there is always something you can walk away with to carry out. Plus the people who write the blog have written a few of my most beloved parenting books.
1) http://www.biblicalparenting.info/ – there is also a sister site link on their page and a ‘university’ where you can take parenting classes on tough issues like anger in you and in your children.
2) http://steadfasthope-thegospelaccordingtomom.blogspot.com/- a great devotional read.
3) http://powerofmoms.com/ – this is a new resource to me but when I went to the site for the first time, it allowed me to download two books for free. They also offer a circle of moms group, where you get together once a month to discuss a parenting topic.
4) http://www.strategicdads.com/blog – dads really get left out but they are essential to our parenting. A full resource for them.
I would love to get your opinion. What are some of your go to resources online and how do you put in to practice being deliberate? I will post more in the future on my favorite parenting books once I am done reading the few I am working through now.
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2 thoughts on “Deliberate Parenting

  1. I’m glad i am not alone. Thank you for sharing. The Lord has been pressing and pressing on my heart to be more unhurried and invested in my children. I feel like i have a few days of moving in that direction and then we get sideswiped by something that kind of shakes me or makes me feel unprepared…such as a horrible teething day, meltdowns or just plain old fatigue to name a few. I am having to learn to press through and remember that there is grace for days like that. And that this precious time is just a season… a season i desire to invest, grow and learn in. Praying for and thinking about you as I experience the same journey.

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